Being Real

Ever since I can remember, I have been blessed/cursed with my , some people say, brutal honesty.  I try to go with the old adage, “If you don’t have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all.”  Do you know how hard that is!!

The thing is that I do it without any malice.  I don’t say things to offend people.  Well, unless they are offending me.  I usually hope that what I am saying is helping them in one way or another.  It really is a show of love and respect.  In other words, “You should worry when I have nothing to say, it means that I really don’t care.”

People say I’m nosey and arrogant but, if that’s how you see me, oh well.  I do expect others to be that way with me as well.  but in truth, I, low key, sometimes get offended. THAT’S when I keep my mouth shut.  A defensive mechanism mastered from the start.

I have a special gift.  The gift of reading people well.  It works 95% of the time.  The remaining 5% is that of reading when women are interested in me.  I know how to flirt, I just don’t trust the woman’s intention.  Is it because she just wants to be funny or friendly?  Does she want to hook up or have a relationship?  Who knows?

That would explain why I am single.  And that’s fine.  It’s life.  The reason I say that is because I NEVER “Rapped” to a woman.  NEVER. We always started out as friends, then, when appropriate, it turned intimate.  BY the way, No problems there.

I’m thinking, I would rather a woman be honest with me and let me know, so that I don’t have to get anxious about how they feel.  At 54, how much time do I really have to decipher a woman.  Which, in itself, is impossible to begin with.

I often find that there are women that I can see myself with.  But, one day we have awesome conversations, then I don’t hear from them for months.  What’s the purpose of that?  It is really frustrating but I know, one day, I will be able to find someone to finish out my life with.

If not, it is meant to be.  As of right now, I’m good.  I’m real and…..

That is all.

Freedom of Speech

I love talking about this.  The ability to say whatever you want, wether it offends or not.  Of course, with the exception of creating harm or violence.  In other words, “You can’t enter a packed movie theater and yell “FIRE!”.

I once had a conversation with a friend about how “Sagging Pants” look stupid.  I asked him “Do you condone the way the pants are worn?”  His response was educational to say the least, “I really don’t like that style but I will fight for the right to wear them like that.”

I got that.  Everyone has individual tastes and thoughts.  To be a true American, is to have the ability to respect each others opinions.  Again, without creating situations that can cause harm to another.  To anyone.

The Presidential transition has brought so much relief to so many.  I have heard, “Oh my God!  How I cried in happiness!”  Others praise the leaving position holder as saying that he was the best President the world has ever had.

Again, I respect all opinions.  However, if you want to talk about it, please be available to listen and appreciate both sides.  I will not get into an argument with anyone that yells at me.

To my friends, I just wanted to say this.  If you are Black, would you support a President that wants to bring Slavery back?

If you are Puerto Rican, how do you support a man that throws us Paper Towels (Not even BOUNTY brand) and calls Puerto Ricans Non-Human?

These are the questions I ponder.  Thank You.

That is all.

A break.

Lately, and yes it’s because of Covid, I’ve been getting lazy and have gained at least 15 pounds.  I hang out at home with very to little motivation.

I want to do things but because of the geniuses that don’t wear masks in stores and stuff, I have decided to quarantine myself.  Only to Dr’s appointments and Groceries.

It’s just difficult to understand why people can’t do what is right as a whole.  I mean, they are the problem.  I’m hoping that things will get back to some kind of normal as soon as April.

So now, I am taking a break and my body is absolutely making sure it gets it.  Tired. Cranky.  Then again I was like that always.  Oh well.  I want to wish everyone an awesome 3 day weekend.  Please be safe and enjoy the time off.


I have to laugh sometimes because the most obvious thing to charge the people that stormed the capital is not even on the table.

I am sure that EVERYONE there and participated in the attempted coup qualifies for a charge of treason.  A charge that if found guilty, would merit nothing less than the death penalty.

I believe that a country has to be questioned all the time.  This country relies on these principals, however, we must all agree that no one is above the law and that no matter what position you hold, you must own up to it.

The funny thing is that Clinton got impeached for a blowjob.  Why are they taking so long to render a quick judgement and just impeach the guy.  2021 will be a change for the better.


Let’s get things done!

That is all.

“It used to bother me, but not that much now”

Being Fat.

Let’s get real, I am a big boy.  I figured at one point in my life I can find someone who would like a big teddy bear to cuddle with and a little extra cushion for the pushing.  But, that’s not how it is.

This is the second time I join a dating site.  This time, the difference is that there is a major class change.  Better quality.  Since I pay for the site, (Not the ass), I wouldn’t expect anything less.  But, I am finding  out that I have the same problem.

I know people see my profile.  I mounted it as truthful as I can but, most likely, the moment they see my picture, they just swipe away.  Little do they know that I am a pleaser.  That I am very talented and would almost spoil the person I am with.

Love to make people laugh, and feel good about themselves.  I mean, I am the whole package.  Living in the projects and everything!  I actually think that living in the PJ’s is my downfall.  I want better.  And soon, I will have.

I am not changing my life for anyone.  I just know that I deserve better.  So, being fat used to bother me a lot.  Now, not so much.  If I can’t love myself first, no one else will be able to love me.

That is all.


Have you ever been in a dark place in your life and see no end is near?  Have you been troubled and confused on why so many obstacles are placed in your way when you seem to have everything in some sort of control?

Well, I have good news for you.  There is light at the end of the tunnel.  2021 is going to be an amazing year.  YOU have to manifest it.  You have to change the things that are keeping you down.  Things like bad habits, negative thoughts and even people that bring you down.  It may sting at first but at the end of the day, it has to be about you and your family because if it’s not about you , there is nothing.

For the young adult circles, yes, it’s cool to smoke and drink and have a good time in this life.  Admittedly, I did what I did at a young age but I have been asked, “Ken, if you could go back in time, knowing what you know now, would you do it the same?”.

My response has always been “YES!”. But change major stuff in my life.  I wish that the young adults that smoke and drink and think that’s going to be all their life, come to an understanding that that shit doesn’t last forever.

That stuff is usually the stuff that fuck you up in your future.  For us older people,  I think we should lead by example for our youth.  We want what’s best for our kids.  For the future generations.  We need to give them motivation to lead an awesome life.  We need to show them that they need to set goals that are not only plausible but necessary to live.

I’m saying all this as my opinion.  I see so many potentially great people in this world.  They seem to be wasting their lives getting high, drunk and just acting stupid.  It’s all a cover.  It’s ignorance. Then they wonder why they are treated differently.  So many beautiful women and good-looking men.  Both smart and charismatic doing things that will make them purely ugly people in the future.

Beauty fades.  Sorry, I went a little long today.  But, my original title today was to let people know that this will end.  That although we will never get back to “Normal”, we will be able to hang out again, go to events and be with family.  As long as you learn from 2021.

That is all.

Okay, so this year’s commitment.

It’s very simple to say that “I will complete my New Year’s resolutions! I promise!”.  Sounds simple enough huh?  Well, I have yet to meet anyone that has accomplished that goal.  In other words, it is easier said than done.

My goal this year, well, not a goal but rather an attitude adjustment, is to be honest when speaking to others regarding my needs and desires.  I expect that some people may get offended.  Some people may be honored or even grateful. At the end of the day I want to “Shoot my shot”.  If I miss the face then I can say I tried.  (Had to do it)

There have been so many opportunities for me to “Ask someone out” or just chill but I WAS always afraid.  Sometimes moreover, intimidated by how the person looks and/or the energy they possess.  I am on Dating sites.  I guess my weight has a factor in responses but whatever.

There were job opportunities that I said no to.  In retrospect, with Covid, I should have taken them.  I was thinking they were either too far or I was just tired.  But in my unnatural self, I said no.  Not anymore.  Again, if I don’t roll the dice, I will never know.

So, if anyone gets to read this, they will know why Ken is acting a little strange this year.  There will be no job I will not take.  Of course, health permitting.  And be prepared.  If I am feeling you, I will ask you out.  Of course, when I find that you are available.  And not by facebook.  LOL

Well, that’s it for now!!!

“There are no Atheists in foxholes”

Every year from 11:45 Pm New Years Eve till 12:15 Am New Years day I am in the shower cleaning off all the residue and shit from the previous year.  As I shower I think back to the negatives and wish them away while “Manifesting” the positive for the new year.

I can “See” it in my mind and I know it will be a great year.  Not just for me but for everybody.  Those that hurt, starved, lost their business, lost their family, to those who even suffered slightly, I tell you, you will be back and better than ever.

There are definite times in everyone’s life when you forget about God.  When you feel like you no longer need him.  Well, I believe that all this happened to remind us all that without “HIM” we wouldn’t be here.  I am now absolutely sure that their have been more prayers in the last 10 months or so than ever in the history of people.

“There are no Atheists in foxholes”

I say this to all…Believe in him and he shall be with you always.  Know that without him, everything can fail.  With him, you have no worries from anything.

I am starting to sound like a preacher.  So, I’ll just end with.  If you are in my life, you mean something to me.  If you’re intentions are bad, they will come to be known.  If you are good to yourself, then all around will follow.

I love some of you, I like all of you.  Be safe.  Be careful. Be healthy.  Be loved.

That is all.


Last Day of 2020

FINALLY!!!!   This most horrible year in my lifetime is over!!!!  I have lost friends and family members.  I have lost income and I thank God that I am not struggling too much to get on going.  Still single and “Lonely”, I still move forward and hope that 2021 will bring me all that I need.  My expectations are high now because they have reached the lowest depths and there is no other way but up.

To those that read this, understand that there is nothing else in the world but life.  That you control your destiny and only positive energies will be your guiding force.  God has your full support.  He will take you where you need to go, you just have to love.  Anyway, my new word for 2021 is “Manifest”.  It will guide me through 2021 and we will all be better people for having gone thru so much in 2020.

May all be blessed with love, joy and happiness for 2021.  May those that lost love ones be in peace knowing that those that passed are in God’s hands and love.

Thank You Lord Father for every breath that I take.

That is all.


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